Self-confession Of A Nurse Anesthesiologist

The truth about what I do... Being a Nurse Anesthesiologist (aka CRNA, Nurse Anesthetist, Anesthesia Provider) is perhaps one of the most challenging, mentally demanding, and intellectually exacting, yet incredibly rewarding career anyone can have! To begin with, just take a look at the effort you need just to spell it! LOL... It's hard to get it right correctly, the first time!

Kidding aside, day in and day out, my calling offers me the special privilege of holding a person’s petrified hand, in perhaps one of the scariest events of any surgical patient’s  life... In any human being’s life, for that matter.

For a moment, envision the thought of getting cut up and entering into an unknown realm where the possibility of death, surgical errors, medical and anesthesia complications, coma, and inevitably not waking up at all, is indeed a fear that is as real as can be.

Yet in as little as five minutes, part of my complex pre-operative conversation with you, aka ‘routine’ assessment, (as you will not witness the behind-the-scene events that may take place, as I keep you asleep during surgery) requires that I put you at ease, reassure you that I will competently act to the best of my ability to be your advocate and savior as you enter the arena of complete darkness... Void of perception of pain and memory, of an otherwise horrific and traumatic event!

Alas, the art of gaining your trust is only the beginning of my task!  As you slowly let go and begin to entrust your life to me, perhaps with entrails quavering inside, yet with hopeful and trustful eyes... You consent to anesthesia... Of which I am actually enthralled at the thought, that in a few moments and hours later, when you wake up, you will gaze upon me with great joy and gratitude at the thought that you are propitiously back into this living world. Gingerly recovering from the slumber, conceivably healthier, and invigoratingly awake, once again...

Such is the exquisite fulfillment and immensely over-powering feeling that I experience and re-live, over and over, as I induce coma to protect you from pain... In the eyes of our Creator, I believe that I have served my calling. My personal commitment of "practicing anesthesia with compassion and excellence, focusing on safety, reliability and professionalism"! Such is my daily dose of reality, and truly, this is my confession.

Which therefore leads me to the conclusion that most of my happiness and contentment in this lifetime, is because of what I do, and because of my vocation...

The exclusive privilege of tending to the sick, and having the power as well as obligation to be your personal aviator as you journey into deep sleep...

In serving my community most of all, as your dedicated anesthesia provider... Every. Single. Day.